EMPOWERING LIVES WITH PURPOSE:
Rev. Lisa Morrison, WWL Guest Writer
I read this line in a book I just finished, “Please forgive me [God] that lately I’ve been poor company for You. I’ve just been bringing my questions and doubts.” (Sue Monk Kidd) This line stopped me dead in my tracks. Oh, how I could relate – all too well!
I had been asking God’s forgiveness for failing in my relationship with Him in the areas of faith, belief and trust – you know, the Biggies! I was upset with myself for dropping the ball in these areas because His track record with me had been one of faithfulness, believability and trustworthiness! It was just that He hadn’t been answering my questions and doubts the way “I” wanted as of late!
My life was upended in 2021 and I couldn’t find any solid ground to place my feet. I was so disillusioned with life, and I took my frustrations out on my heavenly Father with all my questions and doubts.
I know our God is more than able to handle our failings, questions, doubts, frustrations… but in my longstanding relationship with Him, I found that after a while when my questions and doubts seemed to drag on and on, and my relationship with Him was sorely affected, I found myself apologizing for being such poor company.
Sometimes, we think we are the only one experiencing what we are experiencing, so when I read this line in the book, I was comforted to see someone else identified with my problem, but sad, too, that we had to admit we had this same problem.
Like any relationship, it has its ups and downs. This, too, occurs in our relationship with God. Thankfully, He has infinite grace and abounding love for us. He can handle all our questions and doubts. They are not too much for Him, but what I found solace in was I was my missing our ‘good company’ relationship. I wanted it back.
Thankfully with God, we can get our ‘good company’ relationship back the moment we want it. He doesn’t hold grudges or become bitter or angry because we haven’t been good company. He doesn’t hold out on us. Instead, He welcomes us back into our loving relationship immediately when we choose to enter back in with Him. I LOVE this about God and our relationship.
Maybe you’ve been poor company for God lately, and you want to make a change to be back in good company with Him. The good news is He is ready for you! May you seek His forgiveness and experience His loving, gracious arms welcoming you back to that precious, good company relationship you were always meant to have with Him.